On Wednesday, I arrived safely in Port-au-Prince.  Before making the trip to Cap Haitian, I had the privilege of visiting NPH, the program where I worked when I was in Haiti previously.  When I arrived at the new Kay Ste. Ann and the door was open for me, two boys, whose names and faces I knew well came walking towards me quickly and smiling.  I nearly cried with joy, because both of these children have disabilities and one of them could only take a couple of steps at a time independently when I left; the other was not walking at all (the first was the child who I accompanied when had was baptized, the other was the young boy who had been abandoned in the Cholera hospital see previous entries from May 8, 2011 and May 29th 2011.)  It was truly a joy to see the children.  How much they have grown in nearly three years!  It was important for me to see them in their new houses. I reconnected with friends there and met some new volunteers that evening.  The following morning, I attended mass at the little chapel by the Sr. Damien hospital.  The mass, as usual was a funeral, that day for two children.  I am grateful that I had the opportunity to visit there before, beginning my new ministry in Haiti. 

I spent one night in Port-au-Prince at the house that the Sisters of Holy Cross have there.  Early the following morning a Canadian Holy Cross sister who has been in Haiti for over 50 years, a driver and I left for Cap Haitian.  Most of the way, there was a pretty decent rode; sometimes we could see the ocean was on one side of us and mountains on the other.  The sister had some very interesting stories to tell from her many years in Haiti.    

When I arrived at the orphanage here in Cap Haitian the children and sisters were eating lunch.  I was shown to my room, which is quite lovely.  The house is quite nice; it is simple, but we always have electricity and running water.  There are currently three Haitian sisters, one French-Canadian sister, and Canadian lay woman who is volunteering here until the end of October, and now me in the convent which is on the grounds of the orphanage.  I am enjoying the sisters and getting to know them.  Language has been somewhat challenging at times as I am the only one in the house who speaks English fluently.  I have very much enjoyed meeting the children and look forward to working with them.  On Sunday evening we had a party for two of the children’s birthdays.  The children sang and danced and had special treats to eat.  It was quite enjoyable. 

I am glad to be here.  I have not been able to access the internet often or easily.  I wrote this in word so I  paste into the blog when on-line.  By tomorrow I should have a telephone.  I hope that you are well.  Take care!    

many possible entries condensed into one

As I write this entry, I really should be doing something else, like finishing packing, cleaning out the my desk drawer, organizing papers, writing the many thank you notes I want to send before I leave and 100 other tasks.

I have not even left for Haiti, and yet I feel like I have gotten behind on updating this blog.  In the previous entry I had expected to write about the transfer of vows liturgy and how grateful I was for all those who attended: my parents, my twin sister (who surprised me by coming),  a sister and good friend from my previous congregation, a friend who was a Redeemer Ministry Corps (lay volunteer) with me many years ago, members of the local Catholic Haitian community (who sang beautifully after communion), other religious,  friends, and of course many Marianites.  The priest who presided at the liturgy was born in Rhode Island, spent many years ministering in Haiti, and currently lives here in New Orleans.  I was filled with joy and gratitude, or as they say in Haitian Creole, "kè kontan," which translates to "happy heart."

Another topic I want to include was the graciousness with which my previous congregation has accepted and even supported my transfer.  For this I am extremely grateful and deeply touched!      

I also wanted to write about the prayer, and blessing, followed by ice cream cake and conversation that we had here with the sisters in both convents on the property where I have lived for nearly three years.  I will miss each of them and am grateful for their love and support.  Thanks for the beautiful, prayerful send off!

Last night, I attended the Haitian Creole mass here in New Orleans; at the end there was a travel blessing for me.  I could write a entire blog entry about how I began attended that liturgy occasionally to help me not forget the language when I first returned and then gradually in time found myself attending with greater regularity because the liturgies and music are so energizing; it really became my Sunday worship community.  Mesi anpil anpil anpil!      

I also thought about writing an entry about how Fr. Moreau, the founder of the Holy Cross congregations sent religious out  to the "foreign missions" from the very beginning, sometimes when they were very new in the congregation, and to far away places when travel was much more difficult.  It is a privilege to be called to live the charsim of Holy Cross; please pray for me, that I will do so to to the best of my ability.      

Well if I had really written longer more detailed entries about all of those things, I may have bored you, anyway.  I do not intend to update this blog again until I am on the other side of the Gulf of Mexico.  In the mean time, know that I am very grateful for the prayers and support of so many people. Take care!  Many Blessings!          

Transfer: the previously un-blogged details of my Haiti/ transfer story.

The other day I was wondering if I should include a blog update about my transfer from the Sisters of the Holy Redeemer to the Marinaites of Holy Cross, after all this blog is about Haiti. I barely finished the thought, when a realization followed.  My connections to Haiti and my discernment regarding transferring as well as the transfer process itself are very much interconnected.  There were parts of the story left out from this blog, in part because I needed some privacy and freedom to discern.

One of the main reasons for my restlessness in my previous congregation was my sense that I was being called to something else, to go where the needs are the greatest (that is not to say or infer that there are not great needs everywhere; there are.)  Very early in 2010, I was already well into discerning the possibility of transferring, to the point of having some initial conversations with the leadership teams of both congregations.  In one conversation I had with the provincial of the Sisters of the Holy Redeemer she wondered, how it would be for me to try staying a Sister of the Holy Redeemer and perhaps minister elsewhere for a time.  I said I would discern about that possibility and spent a weekend by the Jersey shore praying for guidance from the Holy Spirit.  I felt that God wanted me to try this, to see how it might be to remain a Sister of the Holy Redeemer while working in a ministry and place where sisters in that congregation generally have not served.

I met again with the provincial, one Sunday after mass and said that I did feel called to try this arrangement and not proceed with the transfer at that time, but stated that I could not promise that the call to transfer would go away, because I just did not know.  At that point, I was not necessarily thinking about leaving the country, but being open to whatever God wanted.  I thought I could go to Appalachia, rural Mississippi or might have even considered going across the (Delaware) river to live and serve in a poor section of Camden.  Prior to meeting with me, I don't think Anne Marie had given much thought as to where I would go.  It seems to me that she surprised herself when she said, something like, "If you want to go where the needs are the greatest, maybe you could go to Haiti?"  The earth quake had just happened  a couple of weeks earlier and at that moment I could not have thought of a place where the needs were any greater.  When the earth quake happened, I was in the process of  reading the book Mountains Beyond Mountains, by Tracey Kidder, which chronicles Paul Farmer's work in Haiti.  Going to Haiti made perfect sense; my only concern was whether or not I would be able to learn the language.    

When I was first in Haiti, I was focused on life in Haiti and gave little thought to transferring.  By the Spring time, as the province was preparing for chapter, the possibility that I might be called to transfer arose again.  I was realizing that discerning the possibility of transferring had already taken a lot of time and energy, so I promised myself I would make a decision during my retreat (in New Jersey) that summer and if the decision was not to transfer, I would with the grace of God really, finally let the idea go completely.  On the afternoon of the last day of retreat, I still had no clarity, but did at one point reach a sense of peace with the possibility of not making a decision just yet.  I remember thinking that I want God to hit me on the head with this and make it perfectly clear, and came to the conclusion that the perfect clarity I want from God, may never come.  Then that very evening, God did hit me on the head with it, and provide the perfect clarity I had just decided might not exist.  A Sister of the Holy Cross, who had been in a "small health care community" prior to "coming to Holy Cross" sat down next to me, and even though the meal was supposed to be in silence, having no idea that I had any connection to the Marinaites whatsoever, or that I was a member of a "small health care community" started a conversation with me.  Everything she said regarding her own experiences, spoke to and eased my own fears about transferring.  This was the clarity that I needed, at that point I knew I was called to start the transfer process.

It was also quite clear to me, that I would need to leave Haiti, sooner rather than later once I knew in my heart I would leave the Sisters of the Holy Redeemer and transfer to the Marianites of Holy Cross.  It was not that I wanted to leave Haiti at that point, I had expected to stay of two years and had only been there about a year.  An american sister, from another congregation, who I confided in while in Haiti, said to me "Haiti will always be here."  Maybe someday God would invite me back to Haiti.   (I did not even imagine that I would literally be returning to Haiti, 10 days after completing the transfer process.)  

  Several months ago when discussing my interest in ministering in collaboration with another Holy Cross congregation overseas it was stated that I would need to complete the three year transfer process before leaving on mission.

 So basically, because I was discerning the possibility of transferring, ministering in Haiti became a possibility.  The decision to transfer then became the main reason I left Haiti when I did.  Now that the transfer process is complete, I will be going to Haiti, Si Bon Dye vle.    

   

The Paradox of Preparation

I have been doing several activities to prepare for Haiti.  I have been reading books about play therapy and working cross culturally.   I have been reviewing and even trying to learn some new Creole vocabulary words as well as listening to and reading Haitian Creole.  I visited a travel health specialist and received a couple of vaccinations.  All that I do is likely to be helpful.  In some ways though based on my previous experience, nothing can fully prepare me for Haiti; I will face challenges which I will likely feel and will be utterly unprepared for.  God will give me the grace to do the best I can in whatever situations I encounter.  So the paradox is, preparation is extremely important even though nothing can truly prepare me.  In actuality, I will be both utterly unprepared and very well prepared at the same time.